When Motivation Was Low, But Self-Respect Wasn’t
Well… I made it through the week.
I had to let go of a lot of expectations I had for myself. I showed up for what was already on my calendar. I facilitated a boundaries workshop, a self-talk workshop, held coaching sessions, and joined a women’s business networking group for the first time. At the same time, I struggled to show up for myself. My daily rituals felt like too much work, working on my business tasks barely happened, and my mental capacity was at zero.
The first couple of days, I sat with guilt. It was uncomfortable to see my goals untouched and to realize I didn’t even have the energy to care. Instead of forcing motivation, I chose grace. Because sometimes we have days like this, and sometimes we have weeks like this.
Even though I didn’t have much to check off externally, I accomplished something huge. I followed through, again, on a boundary I set, not a small one, but a big one. It was with someone who has been in my life for a long time, someone it has never felt safe to set boundaries with or to uphold them when they were dismissed. In the past, I gave in by now. I abandoned myself because it didn’t feel worth it, and that’s why this has been so hard.
After years of feeling unsafe, my body and nervous system responded intensely this week. Old patterns surfaced, stored reactions came up, and my system remembered what it had been holding onto for a long time. So no, I didn’t do nothing this week. I did something heavy, something uncomfortable, and something freeing.
I chose myself. I am no longer abandoning myself, and I am standing for what I know is right. I can feel the freedom and power rising as I do.
My boundaries are not up for negotiation.
My silence is clarity.
My no is final.
I honor the strength I used to doubt.
Reflection: Where did I choose self-respect over people-pleasing? What did saying no make space for? What felt hardest about honoring myself, and why?
Action Step: Give yourself permission to disappoint someone instead of abandoning yourself.
