Release the Belief That Holds You Back
I’ve been working on giving my children more independence and responsibility instead of taking everything on myself. I’m a doer, a caretaker, and I’ve always just jumped in without thinking about how doing everything for them doesn’t actually teach them how to do things on their own. It doesn’t teach them responsibility or independence. Sometimes I would let go and hand them the reins, but it wasn’t consistent. It was random, here and there.
Recently, while going through the Self-Reflection & Growth section of Unconditional You: A Journey to Self-Love Journal, I reflected on the prompt: “What is one limiting belief you hold about yourself?” That’s when it hit me. I realized how often I say, “I am not consistent.”
Here’s the thing about limiting beliefs: they’re the stories we tell ourselves that hold us back from our full potential. And I know this. I’ve worked through plenty of them over the years, but they don’t all disappear at once. They show up again when the universe nudges you and says, “Hey, it’s time to face this one.” Right now, consistency is the one I’m working through, specifically, as a mother.
The journal pushed me to dig deeper: Where do you think this belief originated? For me, it came from my personal experiences, especially as a child. I remember my dad coming up with what felt like “crazy” rules at the time. He’d be all gung-ho about a new idea for a few days, but then it would fade away and we’d go back to normal. It got to the point where, anytime he announced something new, I’d just roll my eyes and think, This won’t last. By next week, it’ll be gone. I’m sure his intentions were good, but there wasn’t follow-through. There wasn’t consistency. And I absorbed that.
As an adult, I noticed the same pattern in myself. When it came to my own personal growth, I struggled with consistency. But over the last few years, I’ve really worked hard on building it, especially in my daily rituals and routines. And it makes sense: if I struggled with my own consistency, of course it was hard to model it with my kids. But now that I’ve built a stronger foundation with self-care and personal growth, I feel ready to bring that same consistency into how I show up for them.
The journal also asked: How can you challenge this belief? What evidence do you already have that proves it wrong? When I sat with that, I realized I’ve been consistent my whole life in so many areas. In recent years, I’ve shown amazing consistency in building my business, sticking to dance practice, and following through with my morning routines. I’ve been consistent with budgeting, with how I fuel my body, and with being present and loving toward my kids. I already am consistent. I just wasn’t giving myself credit. And now, I can extend that consistency to teaching my kids responsibility and independence.
To reinforce this, I created a new empowering belief to replace the old one:
“I am very consistent in my life, and I keep doing the reps to build this muscle.”
Every time I notice the opportunity to be consistent and I choose it, I’m strengthening that muscle. And yes, when I choose the opposite, that muscle weakens. So I remind myself daily. I am consistent, and I’m choosing to keep building it.
Journal Prompt: What is one limiting belief you notice yourself repeating, and where do you think it came from? Was it shaped by a past experience, a relationship, or something someone once told you?
Action Step: Write down a new empowering belief to replace that old one. Then, each day this week, look for at least one moment where you can choose to act from your new belief instead of the old one, and jot it down as proof that you’re rewriting your story.
